The question I stopped asking

It's an unfair question and I knew it while I was asking. It puts the coach in a position where the only safe answer is reassurance, and reassurance is worth nothing, which is why I kept needing more of it.

Now the review comes with the answer before I can ask: here's the quarter, here's what moved, here's what didn't, here's what we're doing about it.

The first time it happened I noticed the silence where my question used to be. We talked about the plan for forty minutes and nobody had to manage anybody's feelings.

I've also stopped asking my coach to tell me I'm doing fine, which has made my coach's praise meaningful, because it's now rare and specific instead of a reflex.

That's a strange economy. Verification replaced reassurance, and I need far less of it.

Three years in, the reviews are the reason I trust the coaching. Not charisma, not encouragement. A page every quarter that says what's true, even in the quarter where the true thing is boring.

MOJOWAY's pages exist so that the client's question is answered before they think to ask it, which is most of what "trust" turns out to be.